Monday, April 26, 2010

Once Upon A Time

Once upon a time long long ago, when i was still a little ignorant little boy who still have not much of an idea of what love is, i started a relationship with a girl, not fully aware of what I'm about to do with no plans ahead. Although the time we had spent together was only as short as a few weeks(1 and a half month to be exact), i was truly in love with that particular girl. And whats more, i made a promise. A promise to her that, she will only be the one and only lady that i want to be together with for the rest of my life(i suppose that girl had already erased that memory from her brain long ago...). That promise it seems, is the promise that holds me up together, keeps me strong when I'm weak, and gives me light where there's no hope. And then you would ask why is it that we break up? The reason is simple enough for me. I love her, that's why i let her go.

And as for now. I can see, hear, and even experience it myself, what does living together for the rest of the life means. Everyday and night, I will have to endure the failure of the relationship of mum and dad, quarreling all the time over and over again. Father God tells me that one need to be complete himself/herself before one can start loving another human being for the sake of re-population. Obviously, those people who had marriage failures and divorces failed to do so. Obviously, my parents are categorized as the same group.

As time passes by, I grew really afraid. Afraid of not having completely loved myself and God before i love someone else. Afraid of my kids in the future suffering if me and my future wife had arguments. Afraid of them to have a fucked up childhood because of their parents, just like I did. I used to seek for love and relationship ever so desperately back then. Why? Of course I would! Parent don't love me, families don't love me, nobody loves me... and I thought that I need to find a girl that loves me. I need to feel love. I need to be loved...

But after that, I had finally found my source of love. It has always been there for me since I was born, since before I was born! God had always watched me from above with everything I do. Guiding me step by step to his side. My hunger and craving for love is satisfied. And what's more, this love is everlasting and for eternity and will never ever fades away. Whatever I ask from Him, He does not give it to me, but instead He gives me something even better! Praise the one and only creator of our world God. Hallelujah!

Maybe it seems like a silly promise for everyone who reads this, a promise to be with someone you love for the rest of your life. I made that promise, and i never intends to break it either. If fates allow, we will be together again in the future somehow. Otherwise, I hold no regrets of making that promise and will continue living the rest of my days single and unmarried until i reach the doorsteps of heaven above to be with the Almighty one.

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